Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Life's Play


Comedy and TragedyWilliam Shakespeare once wrote "All the world's a stage, and all the men and women merely players." There are going to be times in your life when those players come and those players go. It's up to you to direct the show, known as your life, if you ever expect to see a happy ending.





What's the story?

Like every play, your life has its own story. You don't really know how it's going to end, or even what's coming up next. The best thing you can do is keep up with what's going on and steer it in the direction you would like it to go. The rest will play out as it will.



Beginnings

Everything has its beginning. For it to be a good beginning, whatever came before had to prepare for that beginning. It may have been some other beginning, or it may have been some ending that started this beginning. Be prepared.



Beginnings usually take up more energy than something in the middle. It's the "ramp up" time… the "0 to 60" that gets you pushed in your direction. If you are beginning something, it's important to remember that, so you don't think it's always going to be tough or unfamiliar. It gets better as you get going.



Endings

What begins also has to end. It's part of the cycle of Life. If you can become accepting of this, and non-fearful of it, you'll have a chance to be braver during the lifespan of whatever it is you're doing. Don't live for the ending, but don't avoid it either.



Entrances

There are going to be people and things that come into the story of your Life. You need to make room for them, if you want them to be a part of your life. That means time and space. If you shift the direction of your life for another, it shows you care (and they should shift for you, or else it sets everything off balance, which is a bad thing).



Exits

Exits are the endings of others. People and things go away. You need to adjust to that as well, or else you just leave an empty space where they were. The adjustment is a form of grieving, and it's all natural. Think of it as filling up with new possibilities.



Final Bow

This is the big ending. The one that "caps" your life… puts the period at the end of your sentence. So what do you want that sentence to say?

Saturday, June 20, 2009

Breaking the Downward Spiral


Break the Downward SpiralSometimes you get into this downward spiral that you start to lose all control of your life. The only way seems to be down... and if you don't do anything it will be. It's time for drastic measures if you're going to prevent a crash. You have to regain control, if you ever want to fly again.





Realize the downward cycle

The first thing to do is realize that you're actually in a downward spiral. Everything is spinning out of control, so it's confusing. Recognizing that it's happening is the first part of gaining control. Gather up as much information as you can about your downward spiral. Where are you heading? How fast are you going? How close are you to disaster?



"I am in control"

You actually have to tell yourself that, or else you'll end up panicking and that'll only make matters worse. You CAN control it; you CAN get out of it. Once a downward spiral has actually started, there are a bunch of other factors now taking over. That can make you feel like you're helpless. You really aren't, but you rally aren't in control either. Now is the time to TAKE control.



Control the symptoms

Once you're in the downward spiral, the cause is irrelevant. Much like treating a runny nose and aching head of a cold, go after the symptoms and control it from there. In an every day life that's out-of-control, it could look like no time for yourself, a messy house, tons of arguments with those around you. You can clean up, get organized and stop trying to be "right" all the time… that will solve most of your downward problems right away.



Stop it!!

The spiral happens because the outside forces are now stronger than the inside forces. You literally have to apply the brakes to the outside. What that looks like in your personal life is saying "stop it" regardless of anyone outside hears it. You have to say it to stop the effect it has on you. Saying "NO" allows you to reach the "YES" that's inside you. It empowers you because you refuse to let yourself be controlled by outside.



Gently... Gently...

You can't just push in the opposite direction. That can make it worse. Being gentle, however odd that might feel at first is the only way to ease out of the problem.



Point away

When things star to ease up, you actually have to start moving away from the downward spiral. Once this happens though, you gain the control back, and can fly again.

Thursday, June 04, 2009

When "Good Enough" Really is Good Enough

perfect blah blah blahWe are bombarded on a daily basis with perfection. "Get the perrrr-fect career, the perrrr-fect car, the perrrr-fect body"… to the point of paralysis. We get it into our heads that since we'll never be good enough, why should we even try?



Yet think of it this way... if everyone ELSE is thinking this and doing NOTHING, then you just have to do SOMETHING to move ahead. To do that, you just have to realize that good enough really is good enough.



Good enough isn't perfect

General George S. Patton once said "A good plan today is better than a perfect plan tomorrow." Tomorrow doesn't come and tomorrow will never contain the future we want if we do nothing about it today. And what if we actually DO get the perfect plan, only to discover it's a day late? Success is in the action, after all… so stick to what works today.



Good enough isn't "settling"

You're actually not compromising quality just because you don't make it "perfect." It's satisfaction with what good you do have. I can talk in clich├ęs all day, but "a bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" seems very fitting right now. What you have with you does matter.



Good enough isn't mediocre

Notice the word "good" in there. "Good" is better than "nothing," "good" is better than "ok;" "good" is actually something worthy of having.



Good enough gets results

Imagine you're in a row boat, and you want the result of getting to shore. You put the oars in the water, you push… it's good. It's good enough to get you a little bit closer to shore, now isn't?



Repeatable "good" is the secret to success

OK, so you're not at the shore yet, are you? Nope… because "good enough" by itself is useless staying in the past. Putting the oars back into the waters, and pushing again… being "good enough" again, and again; gets you to the shore.



"Success comes from doing successful things repeatedly."

~ gurustu